Sunday, October 21, 2012

The Side Effects of Voting Republicrat

          I made this list of side effects when I was bored. I added to it so many different times that I had to delete half of them, narrow down to the best and funniest and it still took me over 10 minutes to read them. I had to speed up the video 125% and even faster in some sections,  just to keep the video watchable. People generally do not have a very long attention span, so I tried to make this as entertaining as possible. Below I will include a full transcript (I added some extras in the video), but here is about 95% of it:


  1. Acute Amnesia
  2. Dehydration
  3. Hypersensitivity
  4. Stroke
  5. Heart Attack
  6. Migraine
  7. Deja Vu
  8. Getting fooled
  9. Stock market crash
  10. Money printing
  11. Rediculous interest rates on your savings
  12. Not having a savings
  13. $6 a gallon gas
  14. Nanny-State
  15. Playing the kazoo
  16. Accepting debt as enslavement
  17. Leaching off of the system
  18. Your neighbors kicking your ass for voting away their livelihoods
  19. Fear
  20. Panic
  21. Something to actually ‘panic’ about
  22. Threats
  23. Smoking reefer
  24. Wishing you had reefer
  25. Giving up alcohol due to the incredible tax hike
  26. Needing everything; having nothing
  27. Delusions of grandeur
  28. Playing the violin in the streets because it pays more than minimum wage
  29. Spontaneous growth of nose hair
  30. Cat food cravings
  31. Ability to attain Buddha-hood while bypassing the steps to Nirvana
  32. Inability to breathe
  33. Temporary tooth loss
  34. Permanent money loss
  35. Severe bleeding of the anus
  36. Redundancy
  37. Redundancy
  38. Redundancy
  39. Ignorance
  40. Complete collapse of civilization
  41. Puppy kicking
  42. Did I already mention Redundancy?
  43. Nausea
  44. Learning every blues song on harmonic
  45. Irritability
  46. Short temperament  
  47. Hostility
  48. Homicidal impulses
  49. Rapid loss of mental clarity
  50. Amnesia
  51. Kidney failure
  52. Diarrhea
  53. Basing your vote on lies
  54. Weaken or absent critical thinking skills
  55. Realization that the two political parties began as ONE - Split in 2 - Are now 1 again
  56. Muscle aching and weakness
  57. Tingling or cramping in the legs
  58. Inability to walk due to medicare being slaughtered like a little lamb
  59. Problems sleeping
  60. Constipation (Because you can’t afford food)
  61. Being Poor
  62. Being Po (can’t afford the other two letters)
  63. Impaired ability to understand logic and reasoning
  64. Shouting at your television and not during a sports game…
  65. Demolishing your t.v. (Shouting wasn’t enough)
  66. Buying a television the day after you broke one because your wife is nagging
  67. Giving up on hopes and dreams
  68. Death of autonomy and the honest American vote which is our own fault
  69. Reality checks
  70. Penalties
  71. Bahhh-ing like a sheep
  72. Fines
  73. Getting fleeced
  74. Incompetence
  75. Idiocy
  76. Failure to observe and separate reality from fiction
  77. Blaming everyone but the ones who created this shit-storm
  78. Finger pointing
  79. Misery
  80. Failure
  81. Chronic smoking
  82. Police brutality
  83. Looking like a fool when ‘Your” president does worse stuff than the guy you bitched about for the last term(s).
  84. Name-calling
  85. More congressional dysfunction if it’s even possible
  86. Increased dysfunction of government programs
  87. Lack of goals and motivation
  88. Nerve damage from watching a rigged election every 4 years
  89. Mental confusion
  90. Trouble buying your b*tch that Louis handbag (Even Knock-offs)
  91. Sexism
  92. Racism
  93. Hating your own race
  94. Disliking white folks
  95. Decrease in pay
  96. Increase in pay because a $100 bill only gets a gallon of gas
  97. Loss of wages
  98. I.D.G.A.F. syndrome (I don’t give a f*ck)
  99. Liver damage and abnormalities
  100. Neuropathy
  101. Shortage of mailbox money
  102. Severe “blow-back” from foreign nations
  103. Whimpering
  104. Weeping
  105. Crying
  106. Sobbing
  107. Bitching
  108. Complaining
  109. Blaming rich people for the government stealing your money through inflation
  110. Whistle-blowing
  111. Occupy welfare movement
  112. Complete loss of faith in government
  113. Civil unrest
  114. Loss of personal liberties
  115. Dollar devaluation
  116. Total destruction of currency
  117. Loss of assets
  118. Foreclosure
  119. Theft
  120. Fraud
  121. Distress
  122. Turmoil
  123. Decay
  124. Erosion of autonomy, rights, freedoms, middle class
  125. Loss of employment incentives and wages
  126. Insufficient job growth
  127. Exponential National Debt Growth
  128. Paper money to the moon
  129. Every tree cut down to make 999 Quadrillion dollars for the paper-fetish-bankers
  130. Rising commodity prices
  131. Lack of consumer spending
  132. Money vortex
  133. Black-hole-Investments at every bank
  134. Planetary upheaval
  135. Fast-food employing 80% of youth in America
  136. More Pawn Shops than gas stations
  137. Debt…
  138. More debt…
  139. Even more debt…
  140. And even more debt than ever before!
  141. Trillions of virtual dollars
  142. Cow fart tax increase of 50% from the current cow fart tax
  143. Less agriculture
  144. Less productivity
  145. Less job availability
  146. Shitty job availability
  147. Un-payable sums of student loan debt outstanding
  148. People going to college to get free money...Wait that already started.
  149. Pooping in your pants
  150. Pooping in other people’s pants
  151. Breaking glass
  152. Breaking wind
  153. Relentless, hot, stinky, wind gusts from your backside
  154. Fried chicken becomes unpalatable
  155. Paying bills using wampum
  156. Starting fires
  157. Thinking your are free, but soon after figuring out that you aren’t
  158. Going to Prison
  159. Going back to prison
  160. Questioning beliefs
  161. Questioning Authority *Note (one good side effect)
  162. Quitting your job
  163. Getting Fired
  164. Layoffs
  165. Closing down and merging of companies and corporations
  166. Capital gains tax requiring first born child and/or blood rights
  167. Falling
  168. Tripping
  169. Climbing the fence back to Mexico
  170. WWIII commencement
  171. Death of the ‘almighty’ dollar
  172. Arguing caused by misleading publications and propaganda
  173. Realization that your president isn’t who you thought he was.
  174. Realizing that your food stamps are slimming
  175. Realizing that half black guy doesn’t give two shits about black people
  176. Cities turn to battlegrounds
  177. Home schooling because your taxes aren’t enough to pay union teachers salaries
  178. Putting your head in the sand
  179. Committing crimes
  180. Massive protest
  181. Indoctrination of enslavement
  182. Suddenly becoming owned by your “Big Brother”
  183. Massive opposition
  184. Loss of firearm permits
  185. Loss of total rights as an individual
  186. Turning your back on “glad-hands” with hidden agendas
  187. America turning into SS police state
  188. Loss of social security
  189. Increase in the minimum retirement age (actually true)
  190. No guarantee of social benefits in near future
  191. Disbelief in your own eyes
  192. Insanity
  193. Body odor
  194. Warts
  195. Hair-lip
  196. Voting for another cloned puppet, but a different color.
  197. War on hugs
  198. Getting robbed
  199. Getting beaten
  200. Getting robbed and beaten by someone who just lost their welfare check and can’t eat or feed their 1-9 babies that are now living in a 86’ deVille on 22” rims... no tires.
Finally... I told you.

Are You Prepared For An Emergency?
Why Wait Until You Are Stuck Without Power To Wish You Had A Back-Up Plan?

You never know how important your power is until you lose it.